


Sleep No More

by Selenay



Series: Friendship and More [10]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Episode Related, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-01-31
Updated: 2006-01-31
Packaged: 2017-12-15 04:39:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/845420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Selenay/pseuds/Selenay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world ends and Elizabeth finally awakens.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleep No More

**Author's Note:**

> Set during 'Before I Sleep'.

Elizabeth stood in the door of the infirmary watching Teyla talk to the older Elizabeth. It was late and the room was quiet, but their voices were too low for Elizabeth hear what they said. She thought about approaching but something in the way that Teyla stood, her head lowered and one hand resting on the other Elizabeth's shoulder, kept her where she was.

It was an intimate gesture, even though the two women were barely touching.

Teyla's hair hid her face. How did Elizabeth know that the older Elizabeth's slight smile would be mirrored on Teyla's lips?

Elizabeth didn't know how long she stood watching the two women. When Teyla reached out to touch the older woman's cheek, Elizabeth closed her eyes. She could remember Teyla's touch, her warmth, even though they hadn't been that close for months. Her cheek tingled and Elizabeth wondered whether it was an effect of the time travel and her duplicate's existence, but she knew that it wasn't.

When Teyla began to turn, Elizabeth stepped back into the corridor and flattened her back against the wall. She breathed a quiet sigh of relief when Teyla left in the other direction without seeing her. It was hard to explain, even to herself, why she didn't want Teyla to know that she had been seen.

The infirmary was still quiet and the older Elizabeth seemed to be sleeping. Rodney was asleep on an examining table and John slept in a chair a few feet away, something that Elizabeth hadn't noticed before. All her attention had been on the Athosian woman. Teyla could draw Elizabeth's eyes in the middle of a crowded room.

The older Elizabeth stirred and opened her eyes. She turned her head slightly and looked straight at Elizabeth, her eyes sharp despite the soft wrinkles and white hair. It should have been terrifying to see what she would eventually be, but Elizabeth found it comforting to know that she might reach that age with her mind intact. Growing old held less fear now.

She moved to the side of the other woman's bed at a gesture and smiled.

"It's late," she said.

The other Elizabeth ignored her. "Your Teyla is a lovely young woman. I saw you watching us."

"I didn't mean to pry."

"She didn't know you were there and I'm too old to care."

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"Do you still love Simon?"

The question left Elizabeth speechless for a moment. There were any number of questions that the other woman could have asked, but that wasn't one she had expected.

"Of course I do," Elizabeth said eventually.

"And Teyla?"

Elizabeth could feel her face heat. She hoped that the blush was her imagination. For a moment she thought about obfuscating, but the knowing expression in her counter-part's eyes persuaded her that there was no point.

"Yes," she said quietly. "Yes I do."

"Do you love her more than you love Simon?"

"Honestly? I don't know." It wasn't what Elizabeth had planned to say, but she couldn't seem to lie.

"Hmm." The elderly woman closed her eyes and for a moment Elizabeth thought she had drifted into sleep again.

Then her eyes opened. "If you hadn't come to Atlantis . . . if you were still on Earth, with Simon, and you'd met Teyla there, what would you have done?"

It wasn't something that Elizabeth had thought about. In fact, the idea had never occurred to her in all the permutations of her feelings that she had considered.

The other Elizabeth's hand was surprisingly smooth despite her age as she reached to grip her fingers. "We came here knowing that we may never see Simon again. The adventure was worth more than what we had with him."

"There wasn't time . . ."

"We both got him the security clearance to know where we were going - our paths were the same on Earth." The other Elizabeth smiled gently. "Staying on Earth wasn't something we considered, but we didn't ask him to come with us either."

Elizabeth's mind returned to the frantic days of preparation for the mission. She had spent months planning for the trip to Atlantis, picking out her team and fine-tuning it at the Antarctic base, but then the breakthrough had come and everything had changed. Everyone had to be moved to Cheyenne Mountain for the trip through the Gate, supplies and personnel had to be found that hadn't been a priority before and Elizabeth had pushed thoughts of Simon to the back of her mind.

Had that really been a conscious choice?

The older Elizabeth's hand slipped away and Elizabeth looked down to see that she was genuinely asleep this time. She smoothed the blankets around her shoulders and left the infirmary, her mind unsettled.

***

The older Elizabeth died, of course, and it was a few days before Elizabeth had time to think about everything that had happened. She had been avoiding the balcony where she and Teyla used to sit in the sun for weeks, but one afternoon she found her feet taking her in that direction and didn't resist.

The salt tang in the air and warm sun on her skin relaxed Elizabeth despite herself. She half-dozed in her chair on the balcony for a long time, thoughts moving lazily through her mind rather than spinning dizzily as they usually did.

Teyla, the other Elizabeth and the city drowning under water seemed to blend until Elizabeth sank into a dream where Teyla was screaming bubbles trapped behind a window and all that Elizabeth could do was watch from the other side.

She woke when someone touched her shoulder. Teyla was a dark shape against the setting sun, but Elizabeth would have known her silhouette anywhere. She couldn't resist smiling for a moment, still half sleepy, before waking up properly and trying to regain her balance.

She couldn't think of anything sensible to say and settle for a quiet, "Hi."

"I did not want to wake you, but you did not seem to be dreaming pleasant things," Teyla said gravely.

"I wasn't," Elizabeth said.

She had never been good at lying to Teyla. If she had, everything might have been different. Elizabeth couldn't regret that because it was one of the things that had attracted her to the woman before she was even aware of that attraction.

"Do you wish to talk about it?" Teyla asked.

"Not really."

Elizabeth stood and walked to the edge of the balcony, resting her elbows on the railing. From here, she could just see the ripples and small waves splashing the pier below. A small flock of birds passed overhead.

Teyla touched Elizabeth's shoulder and she turned her head, just enough to see the look of concern on Teyla's face.

"You are unhappy," Teyla said gently.

Somehow the tone of her voice implied that it was both a statement and a question, to be answered if Elizabeth wanted to or left as the mood dictated. Elizabeth found herself nodding.

"Do you want me to leave?" Teyla asked.

Elizabeth shook her head this time, not quite daring to speak.

Teyla's hand was moving on her shoulder, movements almost too small to feel, rubbing tiny circles that tried to relax tension Elizabeth hadn't realised was there. She wanted to lean into Teyla, give in to the need and want that refused to go away. Why hadn't she ever felt like this with Simon?

"Elizabeth," Teyla said, so quietly that it was barely a whisper. "I-"

That was when Elizabeth stopped. She stopped resisting. She stopped being sensible. She stopped refusing to have what she wanted.

Elizabeth leaned over and kissed Teyla.

It wasn't a gentle kiss. Elizabeth needed too much for that. She kissed Teyla as though the world was ending and she had to take everything she could before it went away. That was how it felt, a little. Her neat, ordered world with Simon waiting at home was ending and she was falling into a chaotic world of feelings and wants and desire that scared her as much as it excited her.

It was only when she pulled away slightly, her lips feeling bruised, that Elizabeth's heart began to race. She wanted to turn away, stare at the ocean rather than meeting Teyla's eyes where she would see only the truth.

Elizabeth was no coward. She met Teyla's gaze and what she read there brought the smallest hint of a smile to her face.


End file.
